A Break-Up Letter to Covid-19 Quarantine

Dear Covid-19 Quarantine ("CQ"),

You've been hanging around for about three months now.  At first, there was a novelty about you, guess you could call it the "honeymoon phase." I had never experienced anything like you, and you certainly were not expected! I figured out your quirks and learned how to adjust to them. But lately, things have changed. I've been feeling that I need more space.  A LOT more space.

I haven't seen my friends because of you, and any self-help book or Dr. Phil episode will tell you that this is not the sign of a healthy relationship!  You won't let me go anywhere, and when I do, you make me hide my face. That's a bit controlling, don't you think?

CQ, being in this relationship has made me too comfortable.  While I appreciate that you don't care how I look, truly I do, I've let myself go because of you. My party clothes hang in the closet, while my washing machine is on a first-name basis with my sweatpants (which, by the way, are getting tighter and tighter.) I forgot how to use my iron. All of the muffins that I am baking are going straight to my, well, muffin top. I miss the person I was before you.

But they say that there is good that can be taken from any relationship, so I will look at the silver linings.  While you made me cook dinner almost every night of the past three months, I did realize that given enough time and planning, I'm better at it than I thought I was. I have tried new recipes and even made fresh pasta, so I suppose I have you to thank for that. 

Since you don't let me go out and socialize, I have read more, which is always a good thing, and have cleaned out some drawers and closets.  However, finding pictures and mementos from concerts and parties only makes me realize that you are just wrong for me.  It's clear that we want different things.

So dear CQ, it's time for me to see other people.  I mean, like, literally SEE OTHER PEOPLE.  Please don't come crawling back, you will just embarrass yourself as I hope to be immune to your charms soon.

Sincerely,
Darlene